Upcoming Book Says: Bitch is the New Black

Anyone that has been around me for more than five minutes knows that I have been bemoaning the lack of SINGLE, educated, successful Black men in the DC metropolitan area, compared to women in the same demographic.  The ratio of available high achieving Black women to Black men has given the fairer sex a disadvantage in the game of love.  However, like a song written off my heart comes the soon to be published book by Helena Andrews: “Bitch Is the New Black”;   the book is a collection of essays chronicling her experiences as single Black female dating in Washington, DC.  The book is due to hit shelves in June and has already been optioned for film. 

Last month, Andrews along with Hill Harper  and Jimi Izrael were featured on a an episode of NPR’s Tell Me More “Black Writers: Where Is The Love, Communication?”.  I would encourage everyone to download the podcast of this radio story because perfectly encapsulates much of the miscommunication that has happening between the genders within our race.  One particularly infuriating moment in the interview comes when Izrael suggests that the reason so man Black women are single is because of our own poor choices.  He suggests in his new book The Denzel Principle that: 

“Sisters decry the shortage of good men and say there is no way she is settling for less than a good Black man. Not just a good one, but the BEST one: Denzel Washington. She, of course, has no idea what that means, what she wants or what a good Black man truly looks like.” –from The Denzel Principle

The thesis of the book –the Denzel Principle–“is the belief that the perfect man—in the form of Denzel Washington—actually exists off-screen and that all Black women can snag a Denzel of their very own.”  With the caveat that I have not yet read Izrael’s book, I–for one–do not know any women for whom this holds true.  I know women with high standards and I know an equal amount who are constantly lowering the bar, with the expectation that real love knows no particular salary range, profession, IQ, or level of physical attractiveness.  These women are phenomenal in their own way–not perfect by any means–but still good catches if you ask me.

Perhaps we should be held accountable for the choices we make, but lets be fair.   The confrontational nature of Izrael’s argument suggests that veiled misogyny  may be at play in his book.  However, we will never know unless we read it. 

I am going to be hosting the first Kabosh Book Salon towards the end of March.  We will be reading and discussing The Denzel Principle.  If you are interested in participating please drop me a comment.  I encourage ANYONE –men and women– to feel free to participate.   I do not want this to be a Waiting to Exhale moment, but a dialogue, a conversation. 


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